So we've settled things with the Halliwells. I should've trusted them and known they wouldn't do things without good reason (or in this case, outside influence). Then again, it's not like they haven't done anything completely inexplicable or out of character before, have they? The Avatars can influence human minds, as obvious by their vision of Utopia, and they manipulated Leo to give them an opening to the CharmedOnes. Now the Avatars are gone, hopefully for good this time. I will never forget what they did to Phoebe, even if they claim it was an accident, and if they cross my path.... I don't have the power anymore to destroy them, but I will sure as hell try.
Our anniversary would've been this month. I'm trying not to dwell on it...it's not fair to Morrigan, and it's not fair to me, either. I know Phoebe would want me to move on and live my life. I will never forget her and all she brought to my life, and I just hope one day I can see her again and that wherever she is now, she's happy.
Leo and I have never been especially close, but I told him should the Elders decide to try to enact any sort of punishment as Piper fears, I would help defend him. I'm sure a demonic lawyer will go over well with the Elders, but I'm proof of what the Avatars are capable of -- bringing someone to the point where they have little choice but to agree to become one of them. And all the good Leo's done surely outweighs this. Without him there would be no Charmed Ones. Without him there would be no Elders.
I think Morrigan would be happier closer to the Halliwells. We could live anywhere and she could shimmer to the manor, of course, but there's a kind of simple pleasure in being able to walk up the street with the kids for a visit. So we've started talking about moving to San Francisco. Things have been extremely quiet around Angel Investigations, and I can be in LA in a heartbeat if Angel needs me, so...why not? The house across the street is for sale, but considering the Stillman sisters used it as their base of operations, I don't think even the Power of Three could cleanse the eau de skank. Still, the price is good, no doubt due to all its prior occupants continually dying mysteriously. There are other houses in the neighborhood; perhaps we'll check them out this weekend.
And I think now is as good as a time as any to set this journal aside. I want to concentrate on my family now -- taking care of Brenna, spending more time with Balor. The mighty Belthazor, raising a family. Who would've thought it?
Morrigan and I ended up staying in Ireland a little longer than we had planned. Morrigan's mother can be very persuasive (though I think Morrigan cheated and told her mother to make brownies -- not as good as Piper's, but I'm certainly not going to tell that to my future mother-in-law).
We told her family about our plans -- well, Morrigan thought it would be best if I asked her father's permission, and he gave it, though grudgingly I think. Her mother was ecstatic; her sister seemed happy for Morrigan but I know Magda has her reservations. Her brother, on the other hand, was decidedly displeased.
In-laws.
And speaking of in-laws, I'm on my way to San Francisco in a moment. I guess it's long past time we met with theHalliwells to find out just why they did what they did. I'm bringing Brenna, but Morrigan (and Balor) is staying with her parents. Maleficent the Evil Fairy, otherwise known as my mother, showed up at Brenna's wiccaning and tried to make a mess of things. Fortunately, upseting a horde of ghostly witches (and living demons) proved too much for her to handle so she didn't do much harm, but Morrigan was wounded. I don't want her to have any more added stress while she's recovering so I told her to stay with her parents while I talk to the Charmed Ones to see if I can get this sorted out.
These past few weeks have been interesting, to say the least. Avatars, demonic attacks, Brenna's birth, and theCharmedOnes completely losing their minds....
First we realized that the Avatars had done something to Morrigan. I think it was during the time it took her an hour to shimmer from Ireland to home. That certainly bothered me at the time, but she seemed fine, so I didn't dwell on it. However, in the weeks that followed, it slowly became apparent that whatever she wanted seemed to be happening. Hence the spa incident. Most were simple demands, such as going out to dinner. //Firewalled from Morrigan and the Charmed Ones But she also almost made me propose to her. //End firewall
Eventually we began to realize something was wrong, but Morrigan's first reaction was that she could use her powers to make things good. I tried to talk some sense into her; unfortunately, it isn't possible to win an argument with someone who can truly order you to "Shut up, Turner." The Charmed Ones confronted her -- it was not her right to judge and force her will on others, after all, and the Elders wanted her stopped -- and initially she resisted their efforts to stop her, but we were able to get through to her and she somehow forced the powers out of herself and returned to normal. I suspected the Avatars -- only they would have that kind of power, but I didn't have proof.
Brenna was born on the 19th last month -- my own birthday, coincidentally. I'm worried because she was born in the manor, and I'm quite familiar with the effect that has had on both Phoebe and Wyatt -- the pull between good and evil. Brenna will already have a hard enough time with having human and demon blood (not to mention being blood heir of the Source). Unfortunately I couldn't shimmer Morrigan anywhere else in time as she went into labor because several demons attacked. They'd been waiting for that moment, sent by the Seer to claim the Source's heir. We obviously managed to successfully fight them off, but we have to remain on our guard. She doesn't have the luxury of Wyatt's shield to protect herself, but she does have very protective parents and powerful aunts. I'll die before I let anything happen to her.
And despite what had happened with Morrigan, it seems the Charmed Ones turned around and did the very same thing themselves. The girls recently made an attempt to change the world, then realized their mistake and put things back to rights. They were working with the Avatars -- and for this very reason, they didn't share their plans with me (or Morrigan, because of her closeness to me and her own anger over the Avatar's little "experiment"). Their intention was to erradicate all demon-kind, but apparently they made sure that Morrigan, Balor, Brenna, and I -- and Morrigan's family -- would remain safe.
They were convinced to undertake this plan by Leo, whom the Avatars apparently targeted much like they targeted me. They brought him to his weakest moment, then offered him power he could not refuse. That I can understand, since they did the same to me, and that I think I can forgive. But how could the girls agree to go along with this plan after what the Avatars did to their sister? How could they have trusted them? Of course there would be a price to pay.
And apparently Zankou is loose now. Not good.
Today is Brenna's wiccaning. She is part witch, after all, and Morrigan wants to present her to her mother's ancestors. We'll be going to back to San Francisco afterwards so that the Charmed Ones can give Brenna their blessing and strengthen the magics on her that prevent the Source from seizing control of her. It's going to be the first time I've really talked to them since learning of their dealings with the Avatars. It's going to be uncomfortable to say the least.
It's been quite some time since I've posted anything here. I've been busy hunting down and killing demons to make sure they won't pose a threat to Brenna once she's born, and unfortunately in the process I've neglected Morrigan. I've always made certain she's safe with someone or that the house is properly protected, but...it's not the same. I shouldn't have left her alone like that, especially not now. I almost forgot it was Christmas eve tonight...had to do some last minute shopping for Morrigan and Balor.
Morrigan wanted to go visit Piper this evening. I was going to shimmer her there, but she told me to stop fussing over her and to sit back and relax. I suppose she has a point -- she knows how to take care of herself. And she'll be with Piper.
So...relax. All right, it's a concept I'm not entirely familiar with. What was that name of that spa that Morrigan took my body to on April Fool's Day? It was on my credit card records. Aqua Day Spa, I think. I'd better hurry before they close.
I had a bad feeling today -- scratch that, two bad feelings. The first felt like the Source rumbling about something, but oddly, it didn't feel like it was raging at me. I can't tell what exactly it's thinking, but it really felt like it was angry about something -- and maybe a little worried. Then later I got the feeling that something was terribly terribly wrong.
Despite better judgment especially regarding my bank account, I took Morrigan out to dinner and shopping last night. A couple of demons tried to grab her, but I took care of them. She's fine, Brenna's fine. Morrigan's right -- I worry too much. I need to lighten up. That feeling I had earlier...it's probably nothing.
Piper prepared a fantastic Thanksgiving feast again. She outdoes herself every year. The evening is winding down, so I thought I'd take a few moments to reflect on what I'm thankful for, as it is the theme for the day.
- For becoming closer to my son, getting to know him better. - That Brenna is safe and well (and will continue to be so). - That theHalliwells...most of them at least...still consider me part of the family. - And most of all for Morrigan -- sometimes I don't know what I'd do without her.
Hmm, I think Piper's breaking out the really good wine now. I'd best head back downstairs.
Morrigan asked me to check up on this "Gary" friend of Prue's. Honestly, she's a big girl and can take care of herself, I don't see what the fuss is about. Plus if she found out I was poking around, I'd never hear the end of it. But then Morrigan reminded me of one of Paige's last boyfriends.... All right, just to be on the safe side.
Anyway, seems he's dabbling in a little insider trading, nothing too major. And he has a penchant for flirting with anything with a pair of breasts. I didn't see anything terrible but Morrigan didn't take the news well and wanted to go talk to Prue immediately.
I don't think it went well.
I'm sure she'll blame me.
I suppose I should check out this Brody as well. Paige is infatuated with him (Not that I can blame her because he's like a younger version of me) and thinks he's trustworthy, but that remains to be seen.
//Firewalled against Morrigan...and Piper...and, oh hell, all women
Apparently I should look into writing a book on wooing women. First I get a call from William asking for advice on where to take Buffy on a date, and then Leo of all people orbed in to ask for advice on winning Piper back. Not much of a battle there, I'd wager, so long as he stops leaving her. She wants him as much as he wants her; he's just go to prove to her he's not going to let anything keep them apart.
All this, of course, leads me to think about my relationship with Morrigan.
I was rather surprised last night that Prue seemed so...accepting, when she's generally the first to criticize me. Little did I know I could buy her affections with Neil Diamond. I know the Halliwell matriarchs disapprove, given the looks they gave me at Chris' wiccaning, but the sisters don't seem resentful at all. It's been a relief -- the last thing I want to do is upset them. Do they truly understand that Morrigan isn't just a replacement for Phoebe? She was there for me to bring me back from the edge. My relationship with her goes back years...decades. I'm not exactly sure where it's going now, but....
I went out today and bought this ring...I gave her one before, but I took it back and threw it away. So now I have a new one. I'm not giving it to her now, it's still too soon. But I have it, and maybe when the time is right....
You think I would learn not to drink and angst. The hangovers really aren't worth the fleeting escape.
Work was, to use a cliché, hell today. The phones were ringing off the hook with people insisting on demonic involvement in the elections the previous day. I think there may be legitimate concern about some of the state races, but I'm afraid the major one belongs entirely to humanity.
The Source has been raging ever since it was tricked back into its prison. We were certain the modified vanquish spell would drive the Source from Wyatt without harming him, but once it was free, it would certainly try to get to Brenna. Paige came up with the idea of using a glamour spell so that Morrigan and I would appear as each other. I'm sure if the Source had taken the time to check, it would've discovered the ruse, but fortunately it did not. It jumped back into me and I was able to lock it down again. I don't like having it raging inside me, but better me than out and trying to possess my daughter. That happened in the future Chris and Wyatt came from, but it's not going to happen here.
I wore the pendant she gave me for our anniversary earlier this year to let her know she's still close to my heart. I feel guilty sometimes for moving on. I know it's what she would want, but sometimes I wonder if she's watching me and angry, thinking I have forgotten her. I haven't. I never will. She woke my humanity, something my mother...Raynor...the Source...tried to destroy. Without her I wouldn't be who I am today.
I'm tempted to just find a hole in the wall bar and drown my sorrows. I should get back to Morrigan's...but Prue's there now, and that's always a confrontation to enjoy. Maybe I'll just stay away for a little while longer....
Happy birthday, love, wherever you are. I miss you.
It's a week late, but I took Balor out for his birthday in hopes of making up for missing it. We shimmered to New York to see the Arms and Armor collection at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Boys day out, as it were.
I let him pick out whatever he wanted for birthday presents. It ended up being a book about medieval warfare and a replica sword. I promised to show him my collection -- it's in storage right now since I cleared out the penthouse.
Then we returned home for trick-or-treating -- this neighborhood is good about setting things up for the kids. Balor's getting a little old for it, but he can't resist being able to run around in his demon form for one night without fear.
Morrigan mentioned something ealier about PrujoPrue wanting to send Leo on a vision quest. Not sure that's such a good idea -- what if he doesn't like what he sees? He's already unstable enough. But if all goes well, hopefully it can bring him some peace and he'll pull himself together and come back to Piper and the boys.
And I have to admit, sneaking a peek into the future is tempting...I'd like some assurance that Brenna and Balor will be all right.
Wyatt has the Source and the Nexus right now. The boy thinks a lot like me, I'll give him that. But maybe we can use that to try to predict what he'll do next.
Piper, Paige and Prue(joy) are saying here at Morrigan's until we figure this out. Piper's still in shock. Prue was trying to distract herself by watching some awful movie last night. It was her birthday yesterday as well. Too bad that seemed to have slipped my mind.
Chris orbed in last night unexpectedly. I thought for a moment it was Wyatt orbing in and almost immolated him. We did learn something very interesting in the course of the conversation that followed. Piper remembered that the other night Wyatt said something about "if only Leo had killed Gideon." But he did kill Gideon. We thought at first that that meant Leo only thought he had killed him, but that Gideon had somehow escaped. Chris, however, remembers it differently -- that Leo had the chance to kill Gideon but couldn't bring himself to do it. He did save baby Wyatt from Gideon, and Gideon was exiled from the Elders. They thought that was the end of the danger to Wyatt's future. Apparently not, since Wyatt still ended up bad. So this Chris and Wyatt aren't from the future -- they're from a possible future that won't come to pass. The question is...how did they end up here, and why?
I also cornered Chris about Brenna's future (and Balor's as well). He was reluctant to tell me anything at first, but since we seem to have proven that the future he comes from is not the true future, he finally caved and told me what I wanted to know. Wyatt kills both Morrigan and me -- all to get to Brenna. When I died the Source sought to possess her, but the Charmed One's spells protected her. Wyatt somehow tricked Brenna and removed the protections so that the Source was able to take her. And from there Wyatt was able to work with the Source (Chris wasn't sure if he found the Grimoire or if he didn't even need it) so that he could hold its power. The Source moved into Wyatt, but Wyatt kept Brenna...as his Queen. And all throughout this Wyatt had bonded with Balor over frustrations about being replaced in parents' affections by a new sibling and somehow slowly corrupted Balor to serve him.
Morrigan was very understandably distressed to hear this -- but the knowledge that it was only a possible future and not what was going to happen was a relief. None of these things are going to happen. None of them. When we set things right, in the future if Wyatt ever so much as looks at Brenna sideways I will put an end to that immediately.
Leo still hasn't bothered to show up to help. I don't understand how he can abandon Piper like this -- she needs him and he won't answer her calls. The girls' grandmother did appear last night with some help from the Elders at least. They confirmed that this Chris and Wyatt don't belong here (helpful as always) and expressed concerns that if they remain here, it would cause ripples or distortions in the timeline that could prove disastrous. (Would it ever kill the Elders to tell us something we don't know?) They did, however, imbue Grams with the power to open a portal to wherever it is that this Wyatt and Chris belong. In theory, if they pass through it, our Wyatt and Chris will return.
We just have to figure out how to get Wyatt through it. And deal with the Source once he does. The Source won't pass to the future since it already exists there (the same reason why Wyatt didn't bring it here with him). I have little doubt the Source will try to jump into Brenna once it no longer has Wyatt as a host. The tonic and the Charmed One's blessing has protected Brenna from the Source while it's been contained in me...I don't know if she could withstand a full on assault of all its power trying to enter her....
Somehow Chris and Wyatt have been transformed into their adults selves -- but Wyatt's future doesn't seem to have changed for the better like we thought it had. From what we've been able to gather, this Chris was brought up being told how he came back in time to save his brother. But while we thought he'd succeeded in changing the future, apparently he didn't. What went wrong? What happens to Wyatt to turn him into a servant of evil?
We'll have to figure that out later. Right now we have to find Wyatt and somehow return him and Chris to their rightful state. Chris has no idea how this happened, and if Wyatt does, of course he's not telling. There are few demons that would have the power to pull something like this off, but most of them are still abiding by the "hands off" rule laid down by the Crone after Wyatt's birth. Maybe the Seer -- if in the future the Grimoire is somehow found and Wyatt underwent the ceremony to become able to bear the power of the Source...she could have called him back here to become the Source....
However this happened, we have to find Wyatt and somehow part him from the Source. I'd be enjoying the peace of not having it inside me raging against its bonds or trying to tempt me with its power if I wasn't so worried about what Wyatt intends for Brenna. He'll get his hands on her over my dead body.
And to top things off, Morrigan and I forgot Balor's birthday in all the chaos yesterday. He's understandably upset. I know he must realize that it was only because of Wyatt's appearance and how he froze me and and Morrigan, but he's still just a boy and it must sting. Plus I think he's building up some resentment to Brenna, which isn't entirely unexpected. We'll have to find a way to make it up to him, I just don't know when. We have to deal with Wyatt first.
Morrigan and I spent today in the Bahamas. Morrigan wanted some sun, and LA has been a little too chilly lately. So we spent a pleasant afternoon on the beaches of Paradise Island. It was tempting to stay longer, but we both have work to do tomorrow. Another time then.
We just got a message from Piper -- our cell phones were out of range all day so we just got it now. Her boys have gone missing. There's no sign of demonic involvement, but if Wyatt's orbed himself and his brother somewhere, she has no idea where.
We've sent Balor over to his friend Ryan's for the night so we can head up to San Francisco. Hopefully we can locate Chris and Wyatt and get them home safely.
The penthouse has been sold. It went on and off the market fairly quickly. The realtor said there were dozens of calls as soon as it became known it was available. Just a few more papers to sign, a few more things to move into storage or get rid of, and then it's done.
Morrigan suggested to me that I donate part of the money from the sale to Angel Investigations. I suppose that's a good idea -- the money could be put to good use there. I'm not sure how Angel would feel about it so maybe I'll do it anonymously.
I have a box of some of Phoebe's things -- photos, jewelry, other personal items. I'll have to call Piper and see if it's okay if I bring them by the Manor tomorrow. But I know she's having a rough time with Leo leaving her again, so maybe I should wait.
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